"If someone attacks me, what should I do? How can I defend myself?"

Joe Sparrow, a deputy with the Monroe County Sheriff's Office and a second-degree black belt in karate, said people would come up to him and ask, "If someone attacks me, what should I do? How can I defend myself?"

"The most important thing is, you have to be prepared when something bad happens or someone tries to attack you. If you're prepared, you're in a much better position," said Sparrow

He said dangerous situations often trigger a "fight or flight" response. Sparrow said doing nothing is worse.

"The most important thing is not to freeze. Because bad things often happen when you do absolutely nothing."

He said simple verbal communication can deter an attacker. "I tell people, 'If someone comes at you, you have to say something, you have to shout, to disrupt them; you can't just let them have their way.'"

Sparrow said simply shouting "stop" at a would-be attacker could deter the person.

He also told attendees that sometimes it's just best to run away from your attacker


Read More: http://www.poconorecord.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20120415/NEWS/204150331
Image: http://butlercreative.blogspot.ca/2010/12/kodi-colip-stop-sign-design-final.html

Tips to Keep Yourself Safe

 By Dylan GoforthPhoenix Staff Writer


(Discussing what things will be discussed and taught at an up coming self defense class Deputy Chief Tony Ponds said) “One of the things Chief (Bob) Haley really stresses is awareness and having people be more aware of their surroundings, And with summertime coming, there are different things to look for in terms of keeping yourself safe.”


Stan Mitchell, a self-defense expert wanted to stress the importance of self-awareness as a first step in safety.


“Being aware of what’s going on around you is something that cannot be stressed enough,” Mitchell said. “Profiling is a nasty word these days, but it’s something we do — good or bad. We can use that profiling concept to look toward potential danger coming at us.”


Mitchell said. “If someone is angry and screaming or is asking for your money, sometimes there are better ways to deal with that situation than just fighting back.”


To read the entire article: http://muskogeephoenix.com/local/x157474490/Wagoner-police-offer-free-self-defense-class
Image: http://allbusinessservices.blogspot.ca/2012/03/bounce-house-safety-tips-for.html

Five W's of Self Defense by L. Spain, Yahoo! Contributor Network

Five W's of Self Defense 

by L. Spain, Yahoo! Contributor Network

These things to avoid are called the Five W's of Self-Defense. They are wrong time, wrong place, wrong people, wrong attitude, and wrong techniques.

While the five W's may seem like a silly mnemonic device, they are actually powerful truisms. If you avoid the five W's and pay attention to the five A's of self defense, you will live a lifestyle that will generally help you avoid trouble.

Wrong time. Crimes happen day and night. But, radio talk show host Neil Boortz has often said that nothing good happens after midnight and he may be right. The drunk drivers are out on the roads and criminals may use the cover of darkness to commit robberies, burglaries and other violent crimes. Most sexual assaults and rapes happen at night. Convenience stores are often the targets of late night robberies. If you can avoid being out at the wrong time, you may reduce your chances of being targeted.

Wrong place. Have you ever noticed how many shootings happen after midnight in the parking lots of strip clubs or bars? If you watch your local news, you will soon see patterns in the crimes that happen in your community. You can avoid a lot of problems by avoiding high crime neighborhoods, frequently robbed convenience stores, and rowdy bars where fights happen regularly.

Wrong people. It seems like half the world's criminals were good boys who just fell in with a bad crowd. If your friends are involved in criminal activity, it's likely that you too will get caught up in their crimes intentionally or through circumstances. Criminal activity is not a rite of passage, a mistake people make, or an uncontrollable urge. It's a result of poor decision making and choosing the wrong friends. It's important to avoid being friends with criminals or people who are likely to be criminals. Similarly, if you recognize gang members or other potential criminals out on the street, you are well advised to give them a wide berth.

Wrong attitude. Do you think you are a bad dude now that you've gotten your concealed carry permit, your black belt, or your slick pocket knife, you're half way to problems right there. Accumulating weaponry may simply lead you down the road to becoming a mall ninja. If you carry a concealed weapon, you don't want to be a cop wannabe. Don't get caught up in macho efforts to prove your toughness. Often it takes more strength and self-control to back down from a situation than to get involved in a fight.

Wrong techniques. It's important to use the appropriate technique to avoid conflict and prevail with appropriate force should if you are attacked. Techniques like using reasonable tones, being assertive, or walking away usually work well. But, when they don't, you must be ready with the right self-defense techniques to defend yourself.

Over the years, I've been able to keep out of trouble by being aware of my surroundings and avoiding people and places that are likely to expose me to crime. You can do the same by remembering the 5 W's of self-defense.

Read More: 

http://voices.yahoo.com/five-ws-self-defense-11249920.html?cat=5
Image: http://northernkentuckyhotels.com/2010/07/hotel-room-safety-tips/ 

Safety First

Allen Reed and Andrea Dubnick said they spend much of their lives helping others learn to be safe.

 

“What we teach is avoidance techniques,” Reed said

Dubnick said she wants to be able to convey to women how to get out of a bad situation and learn how to escape.

 

“Running away is fine, but many times you can’t — women are often in heels,” Dubnick said.

 

“It’s like any physical skill — it’s a perishable skill — you lose it over time,” Reed said.

 

Reed said the common predator is like a wolf, who often tracks prey. These people often set up a situation that makes escaping hard.

 

Read More: http://www.journalstandard.com/news/x1018066280/Self-defense-training-to-be-held-to-teach-safety-techniques?zc_p=1

Images: http://www.journalstandard.com/news/x1018066280/Self-defense-training-to-be-held-to-teach-safety-techniques?zc_p=1 and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gray_wolf

Breaking the Silence: Why Men and Women Must Stand Together on Sexual Assault by Nico Lang

This article was written so beautifully that I had to share it with every one

Breaking the Silence: Why Men and Women Must Stand Together on Sexual Assault 

by Nico Lang

I've always understood what the words "rape" and "abuse" meant -- or the basic definitions at least. My elementary and middle school (nestled in the suburbs outside of Cincinnati) were oddly good on sexual education for a small Ohio town and, as early as third grade, I can remember sitting in class and learning about sexual abuse. We watched videos that told us what inappropriate behavior was and where an adult was not allowed to touch you.

However, I never really thought about that as applying to myself or anyone I knew. I always secretly believed that sexual assault only happened to other people, like the kids in those videos or on after-school specials or on 90210. Outside of class, my family didn't talk about those things, and my grandparents (who basically raised me) were adamant about protecting me from the evils of the outside world. They didn't want me to ever have to know what things like that were -- or who they affected.

For my entire childhood, I knew that my mother avoided crowds, but I was young and thought it was just because they were noisy and sweaty. But when I was 12, my mother took me to a Jewel concert with her, because she didn't want to go alone and had no one else to go with, and I remember the way she clung to me so fiercely and protectively, her nails nearly digging into my skin. At the time, I thought she was just worried about my safety -- in the normal way that all moms are -- but I would later find out what the extent of that worry was.

When my mother was 16, she was raped at a fireworks show, the one our hometown has every year. And no one did anything about it. No one helped her fight off her abusers. They let her be raped. As a kid, I used to beg her to go to that show, to sit with me and watch the city set the sky on fire, but she always refused, and I hated her for it. We would watch it instead at home, and she would sit so far from me, watching in silence.

For so much of my life, she has been silent about what she went through, and like so many people I know, still can't quite find the language to speak publicly about her experiences. On the day that my mother told me about her experience she lifted the veil on what so many go through every day -- women and men alike. I've witnessed so many others deal with the same issues. I watched one friend crumble under the weight of sexual abuse, listened to her blame herself, sat with her as she decided how to "take care" of the situation. In college, I watched another friend's marriage fall apart because her partner didn't know when to stop. This came from someone she thought she could trust, someone who was supposed to love every part of her.

As a queer man, I recently came out publicly about my own experiences with being assaulted, and since that time, I have continued to have the veil lifted, as others shared their stories with me and I further became a witness to the ways in which people survive abuse. I learned how we all have a role in helping others survive. As a recent TED talk from Tony Porter suggested, men must join that fight; we all must work together to break the silence around rape culture in America and speak out about the ways in which that culture specifically affects women. The common statistic is that 1 in 4 women will deal with rape, abuse or sexual assault in their lifetime, but those figures have been much questioned, as that statistic only includes those willing, able or ready to report it.

This is largely because we live in a society in which victims feel powerless to report their abuse or do anything about their assault, especially younger women who have less experience with sex, who might not quite be aware of the gravity of the situation and who might be overwhelmed by the burden proof placed upon victims of abuse. Vanessa Pinto of the Huffington Post discusses a powerful one-woman show on the subject by Nancy Donoval, and in it, Donoval describes her experiences as a young survivor:

It wasn't until Donoval was dating another man that she had a name for what happened to her. She tried to explain to her partner why she was reluctant to take the physical part of their relationship very far. After she told him what happened, he told her that she had been raped. Back then there was no language for date rape or acquaintance rape. Rape was something that happened by some strange person lurking in a bush; it couldn't possibly happen from a person you trusted or consider your friend. Even now that those phrases are commonly used, many survivors still don't identify what happened to them as sexual assault or rape.

For those who do report it, the story is not much better. According to RAINN.org, a woman in the U.S. is sexually assaulted every two minutes, but only 46 percent of those cases will be reported to the police. And only 3 percent of rapists will serve any time in prison for their actions. Last year, the Chicago Tribunesurveyed a number of universities in Illinois and Indiana about their sexual assault prevention statistics in the previous six years. The Tribune found that only four of the 171 reported sexual assaults on those campuses, only 12 led to an arrest and four ended in a conviction, a scant 2.4 percent of the original reportings. Between 2005 and 2011, Notre Dame, Northwestern's Evanston campus and the University of Illinois at Chicago had seen not a single conviction from their reported sexual crimes.

This month, we will see a number of incredible activists, feminists and allies work to change those statistics with the annual Take Back the Night Protests, which seek to raise awareness about on these issues and "end violence and institutionalized violence" across the globe. However, they cannot do so alone, because none of us can fix our culture of silence in just one month or with just one action.

As we observe Sexual Assault Awareness Month, we must realize that our responsibility to the women and men who have been affected by sexual violence extends for more than just 30 days. Education and outreach are life-long endeavors, and we must continue to tear down the structures of negative masculinity and patriarchy that oppress women across the globe. We must challenge the discourse that tells women that it's OK to be harassed by a man in street for wearing a short skirt and that they deserve to be assaulted if they dress or act a certain way and work together to change that narrative. We must stand with those who have the ability to use their voice to speak out on this issue and with those who remain silenced. You never know who is keeping quiet.

original article: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/nico-lang/sexual-assault-awareness_b_1427525.html
Image: http://sexualassault.appstate.edu/if-sexually-assaulted

One of the Best Weapons You Have is Confidence

Self-defense expert Wally Holem says one of the best weapons you have is confidence.  

"Confidence is huge because, without confidence, you're just going to collapse mentally and that's the worst thing that could happen to you on the street, or at your home, if somebody was trying to attack you.  You need to stay confident and know that, hey, I can do something,"

Read More: http://www.fox28.com/story/17513956/self-defense-tips-from-local-experts

Image: http://imaginethespirit.wordpress.com/2011/10/08/62-rules-to-build-your-self-confidence/recapture-self-confidence/

Police Composite Drawing of Suspect: Girl escapes attempted abduction in Calgary Alberta

Police Composite Drawing of Suspect: Girl escapes attempted abduction in Calgary Alberta

The suspect is described as white, in his 20s, standing about six feet tall. 

(Calgary Police Services)

It was still light outside, she said, and the young girls frequently play at the three parks around their neighborhood.

Police are searching for a man who apparently tried to abduct a young girl in Calgary's southwest on Tuesday night.

Two girls, aged nine and 10, were walking in the 3400 block of 28th Avenue S.W. around 6 p.m. when police say a man got out of his vehicle and grabbed the nine-year-old from behind — lifting her off the ground.

The girl kicked and screamed until the man dropped her. He fled in his vehicle, which is described as a 1990s beige or gold four-door sedan with three lines on the side that may have been molding.

The girls ran to the home of one of the victims to tell her parents, who then called police.

Duty Insp. Keith Cain said these type of daylight kidnapping attempts are rare and alarming. “The girls did the right thing, they reacted properly,” he said. “She fought, she screamed, she alerted other persons to her danger, and as a result the offender was scared off.”

He said there are a few witnesses to the incident being interviewed.

Family trying to move forward

The mother of the 10-year-old girl, who did not want to be identified to protect her daughter, said the two girls were riding their bikes.

The incident happened as the girls were walking their bikes home.

The family says they are trying to move forward so their daughter won’t live in fear and even sent her to school the day after the incident.

The suspect is described as white, in his 20s, standing about six feet tall. He has a slender build with shorter brown hair and brown eyes.

He was wearing a red T-Shirt with a small Calgary Flames logo on the upper chest, beige pants and black shoes.

“I think all citizens of Calgary have to be aware that this person is out there,” said Cain. “Hopefully parents will speak with their children ... let them know what they should do in a situation like this, and that of course is to fight back and make noise.”

Calgary police are reminding parents to talk to their children after an attempted abduction of a young girl in Killarney. Would your children know what to do?

Read More:  http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/calgary/story/2012/04/04/calgary-man-suspect-little-girl-abduction.html

Gavin de Becker Teaches Oprah About the Gift of Fear

Gavin de Becker Teaches Oprah 

About the Gift of Fear

Best Self Defense Classes

If you are looking for a Self Defense class and not necessarily just a martial arts class you should inquire if the program teaches and emphasizes awareness, avoidance and physical self defense with the tools you possess all time; ie hands, feet, elbows, knees, head, etc.. Many, but not all, Martial Arts classes will teach you these techniques but not until the higher belts. Do your research before you sign any contract---make sure you are getting what you want and need. Many schools will allow you to take aprox 2 weeks free and let you sit in the room that their teaching--take advantage of this.

If you would like some input with your decision drop me a note.

How Intuition Helped Save Jaycee Dugard - Oprah's Lifeclass

Don't Engage in a War--Gavin De Becker

“...don't engage in a war. Wars rarely end well, because by definition someone will have to lose” Gavin De Becker

Image: http://www.eftwithdeborah.com/personal-peace-procedure-facebook-group-starting

Online Safety Guidelines

I Found these guidelines from ask.com, great advice. 

Online Safety Guidelines

Food for thought while using Ask.com:

• Remember that all of the information you put on your profile is public information and linked with your user name.
• Do not give out too much personal information in your profile, bio, questions, answers or comments (i.e. your full name address, telephone number, school name).
• Be extremely cautious about making arrangements to meet in person with strangers you meet through the community.
• Do remember to flag users whose content you find objectionable, offensive or abusive.

Original article: http://www.ask.com/about/community/online-safety

Image http://etechbee.com/list-of-top-internet-service-providers-in-pakistan/

Internet Safety Song for Children

This video/song can help children with internet safety

Stop. Think. Connect. - Stay Safe Online

How to Stop Cell Phone Harassment

This research comes from a question, one of my friends had about harassing cell phone calls with obscene pictures attached

How to Stop Cell Phone Harassment

By James Clark, eHow Contributor

Cell phone harassment is illegal in all 50 U.S. states. Not only is it annoying, but unwanted calls also burn up the minutes available in a cell phone plan, resulting in lost calling time and wasted money. Most states define telephone harassment as an obscene communication or any verbal or text message threatening physical harm. Intent is also necessary to establish a criminal complaint of harassment, either by repeated calling or specific threats in a single call. Fortunately, there are several options for stopping harassing cell phone calls, up to and including legal action

Instructions

How to Stop Cell Phone Harassment

1. Block unwanted incoming calls by entering the caller's phone number, including area code, in your cell phone's call-block feature. The procedure varies with cell phone models, but typically involves scrolling to "selective call block" and pressing the "enter" button.

2. Report threatening and obscene calls or text messages to the police, so the calls can be traced if the harasser is using a caller ID blocking feature.

3. Save any harassing voice mail or text messages for use as evidence.

4. File a written report with the police to initiate a criminal investigation and secure a subpoena for the telephone company, which may require formal legal service to release information about a caller's identity.

5. Stop annoying sales calls by registering your phone number with the National Do Not Call Registry (https://www.donotcall.gov/default.aspx), which will reduce and possibly even eliminate telemarketing calls. Registration is free, does not expire, and can be done for every phone number you have.

6. File a complaint with the Federal Communications Commission by email (fccinfo@fcc.gov) or online at www.fcc.gov/cgb/complaints.html.

To read the entire article: 

http://www.ehow.com/how_5089510_stop-cell-phone-harassment.html

Cell phone picture:
http://ranobecafe.wordpress.com/2010/02/20/the-top-10-cell-phones-novels-in-english/

Internet safety video for teens and parents to talk about together

Internet safety video for teens and parents to talk about together

How to REALLY check out your online date

Avoid dating disasters by snooping on your potential love
By: Keith King 

OVERLAND PARK, Kansas - The popularity of dating websites has exploded in recent years.

But as more people open up online to romance, many open themselves to big risks.

Now a Call For Action special report shows you just how easy it is to avoid some risks by simply snooping on your potential love long before you meet face to face.

Meet Cheryl. She is an Overland Park widow who loves to read, spend time with friends, and dogs. Cheryl lost her husband of 35 years in 2007 and recently she decided it was time to date.

She went on match.com . Before long, Cheryl was being pursued by a potential Mr. Right.

"I saw his picture. I’m the one that winked at him," Cheryl says.

The guy said his name is Karl Jens, a 60-year old construction engineer who is a widower and father of a teenage boy from Kansas City, Kansas. Raised in Denmark, Karl came complete with an accent and all the right things to say.

He writes:” I’m a gentleman looking to meet a lady, first as friends and see what life has to offer us.”

Cheryl was smitten. She says, "He saw my picture. Very interested. Kind of saying the things that women like to hear."

The two talked for weeks. But when the time came to finally meet face to face, Karl suddenly got called away to Malaysia on business. Then, Cheryl heard him talk about a business emergency where he needed money. He asked Cheryl for $10,000. She eventually wired him $2,000.

The requests for money didn't stop there. Next, Cheryl says Karl’s 13-year old son needed surgery and Karl again needed money.

Now suspicious, Cheryl called Barstow, the Kansas City school where Karl said his son was enrolled. She learned no one by that name went there.

Upset and out $2,000, Cheryl ended it with Karl.

She told him, “The gravy train stops here."

Cheryl is not alone. In November, the Federal Trade Commission issued a warning to anyone using dating 

websites to be on guard for scam artists. The typical scenario is when a scammer creates a fake profile, gains trust, and then asks for money to be wired outside the US.

Chuck Stephenson is a local private investigator who says these days more people turn to him to background someone. Most times, the person is not who they say they are.

"I’d say close to 60% are money issues where that individual will eventually ask for money,” Stephenson says.

A recent New York Times article shows online "Date Detectives can Unmask Mr. or Ms. Wrong". Everything from websites to smart phone apps offer to background your potential mate for a price.

There are ways for you to dig up dirt on your potential mate for free.

First stop: Zabasearch . You can type in a name and a state to unearth information. Try the advanced search to uncover more goods.

Next, check court records. Websites like casenet.com in 

Missouri and jocogov.org can tell you a lot if the person has a criminal past.

Each state including Missour i and Kansas also has a sex offender registry. There's an FBI national sex offender registry too.  Those are easy to check. Do it!

Try to learn the address of where your potential love lives. Then, go to work. County websites like Jackson County, Missouri list property including homes, cars and other toys.

As for Cheryl, she thought her guy was legit. He sent her copies of business contracts and documents that appear real. They’re not.

"I feel very gullible. I feel very stupid… I think I learned my lesson,” she says.

Cheryl bravely shares her online dating horror story hoping it may spare someone else heartache.

Want to learn more about snooping?  Click here for some great additional tips.  

Read more: http://www.kshb.com/dpp/money/consumer/call_for_action/avoid-dating-disasters-by-snooping-on-your-potential-mate-#ixzz1od4yL6Sq